Sometimes I feel like I'm a human tent post, being repeatedly hammered into the ground. The feeling of relief, boardering on elation that i felt after the end of our IVF treatment has not lasted. What is it this time? DH has just told me that SIL2 is expecting. I knew this would be coming after her m/c earlier this year, so why do I feel such desolation?
It's our turn to spend Christmas with DH's family and already there will be five under thrrees, and SIL2 will be obviously imminent and i wouldnt be surprised if somebody else will be expecting 'happy news' by then too. It's very hard at the best of times dealing with small babies and pg women, so how will i handle next week's Christening, let alone Christmas. I've never dreaded Christmas until we started having our fertility issues and other people started having babies, but the pain involved in having to tolerate it all is heartbreaking. When will I stop feeling like this???
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